Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. If you aren’t in a romantic relationship, chances are that you’re looking for one. Are you looking on the job?
Although only about a third of U.S. workers admit to considering workplace romances, the fact is that many employers have no official policy either for or against them.
Now, I’m not going to get into the “should you or shouldn’t you” debate. In fact, your company may even have formal rules about employees who date or married – ask HR when in doubt.
But, if you are in a relationship with someone in your office, February 14th might just be a potential minefield. Let’s talk about what is or isn’t appropriate behavior on the job…
Obviously, if you’re keeping your relationship a secret from coworkers and management, romantic gestures will have to wait till after 5 pm. But if you’re in a public relationship, perhaps even married, that still doesn’t mean you can let your inner Cupid run wild in the office.
The main thing you need to know about Valentine’s Day in the office is summed up in one vital word: office. You are still at work and business trumps romance.
That means:
1. No public displays of affection. They are inappropriate and make others feel embarrassed. If you’ve spent time and energy building a professional reputation, don’t tarnish it with a mushy PDA. This is something you might want to discuss with your partner ahead of time, just in case he or she is more outgoing about such things. Use your day to work, not cuddle with your amour. That is another reputation killer. If you want to send flowers to the office, fine, as long as they don’t embarrass or put anyone on the spot.
2. If you’re the type who loves to send Valentine’s Day cards every year, this is not appropriate at the office. It will likely come across as cutesy, childish, unprofessional, or worse, if someone misconstrues your card to mean something it doesn’t.
3. Do not give Valentine’s Day gifts to your subordinates or to your managers. They also can easily be misconstrued. A card or gift you think is funny can be seen as a come-on, and the last thing you want is to run afoul of company policies, or worse yet — sexual harassment standards!
4. I really hope I wouldn’t have to say this one, but here it is anyway: Avoid office relationships if married to someone else! However, since affairs do occur, let’s just say it’s the height of bad taste to celebrate Valentine’s Day at the office with your extramarital relationship. Can you say, GOSSIP?
5. If you’re one of the lucky ones who receives flowers while at work, don’t brag, gush, go on and on, spend a half hour arranging them in the vase, texting everyone you know, and generally make others feel jealous or annoyed. Discretion! Professionalism!
6. Valentine’s Day doesn’t give you a green light (or excuse) to “come on” to that attractive coworker you’ve had your eye on for months — even if you’ve been flirting. If you must proceed, do it with genuine caution … on an ordinary day, not February 14.
I hate to rain on your romantic parade, but in the office, Valentine’s Day is really just a work day like any other!